I feel guilty for writing poems
for this one and all the other ones
Because everyone I know has tried to give me
alternatives to my life
I never tell them to go fuck their self
I apologize
****
I like the freedom that the fear gives me
I’ve been afraid of so much that when I feel it I get nostalgic and the surge of adrenaline pushes me to kill it’s source. That’s why it took me so long to quit.
When a thing settle in and relaxes -that’s when it hurts to get punched in the head
Fear numbs out the pain. Compassion magnifies it
Sometimes when we make love
I cry after you fall asleep
The beauty and pain in this hard life
sometimes gets jumbled up together and is expressed in the same sigh or breath
Everyone time I’ve cried I’ve said, I’m sorry
Without compassion for myself
Its time to change, for me
Annieepoetry 